Frequently Asked Questions
I have been interested in counselling since 1988 but due to circumstances I was not able to realise my dream till quite late. At the time I didn't know where to turn for help or release my bottled up feelings. In women's refuge I was given unconditional support and a counsellor helped me to express my feelings in the open, without judging, looking down, ridiculed or guilty at my actions instead offered other avenues that I could ponder to bring beneficial changes in mine and my family's life and. In 2013 I had an opportunity to study six week 'taster course on counselling and counselling skills' and if I still wanted to pursue my goal. At the end of that course I enrolled for four years at North West London through Chrysalis Courses to study counselling and counselling skills.
I regard counsellings' main function is to provide a platform where s/he could express their worries and fears in the open without being interrupted or advised how to lead their life style. Job of the counsellor is to empower the client into thinking independently and about his needs or inner happiness. Client should not feel guilty or under any obligations towards the counsellor because feeling free at making decisions independently to suit own life style. This course helped, by highlighting on number of counsellings' that are available in the market to help client into deciding which type of life style to lead. Having access to various therapies both client and counsellor could mix or rely on the that is suitable for that particular individual. Course gave me an insight how each person is unique in his body make-up, even siblings of same two parents are not alike and treatment has to reflect client's modality, temperament, background, creed, race, habits, health issues, customs to be effective for his treatment. I also realised therapy to be successful client's childhood experiences, upbringing of parents or main carers' attitude and their influence in moulding the child's character and forming into the person s/he later becomes.
To make counselling effective I pay close attention to details through active listening, observation and paraphrasing back client's expressions for clarification on what was said or meant. This helps in creating bond and that I am not only paying attention but believing in his problems and there effect on his well-being. is necessary to create rapport with the client is tp
to make mental notes on t client
I have a good rapport with most people due to my curiosity and desire to learn about people. People in spite of there background or part of the world they belong all have same common goal like striving for same things, enough food, good life, education for children, competitiveness, family well-being, health problems, respect in the family, community and becoming grandparents.
Counselling is useful if client wants to overcome his negative life style - stress, phobias, habits, not able to fulfil family's expectation or peers demands by attending counselling sessions. I believe main job of the counsellor is to understand the client and find out about his life history and his background before starting therapy sessions. If client is keen to have counselling then I will work on his weaknesses so he could overcome his fears by setting manageable tasks through building of self-confidence. Clients when realising that he has achieved or can achieve will be keen to take on further tasks to reach his goals just like his peers. I strongly believe in building self-confidence to over coming hurdles and life problems, reasons for procrastination,addictions or habits. By talking and discussing on the issues, negative and positive benefits on habits and addictions on s/he's health, family well-being, effects on children and family finance would help in deciding which route would be more suitable or beneficial for s/his life style. Once gaining self-confidence and practicing with me in saying 'No' would help him to say the word without feeling bad or guilty.
I speak quite few Asian languages and little French. Being Asian I am familiar with Asian culture and their values and able to challenge Asian clients and discuss their particular values or beliefs and for whose benefit these customs are adhered.
I am supportive and have understanding on what client is going through in his/her life by creating rapport and trust. I keep box of tissues, jug of water or tea as the occasion arise while remaining professional.
. important as its not straightforward began to study the subject in depth since then was able to study hof their situationto some other person who might
My 'cultural, customs and family expectations' were having negative effect on my behaviour and thinking. I could not open up to anyone because no one would listen but advice to grin and bear. yet I was embroiled in my unhappiness could not affecting my thinking unable to free myself and family honour began to bother me and the helplessness of not airing my feelings to anyone
offering space, understanding and believing in their problems through trust and rapport.